First off, I don’t think she was really a girlfriend.

I’d think of her more as a “rental.”

He picked her up at the 2010 Super Bowl – him on the north side of 80 and she on the gold side of digger – and they were a perfect match.

Trash on trash, scum on scum.

She providing whatever it was she was to provide, and him rewarding her with a Ferrari, a Range Rover, and a couple of Bentleys.

One for each implant.

Plus the quarter mill for “maintenance expenses” and the $1.8 million love nest.

I’d tell you her name, but she’s used four of them in the last handful of years. I’d tell you his name, but you know it already – it’s Mud.

Big, fat, ancient, rich, bigoted Mud.

That’s what the audio shows.

No one can vouch for the authenticity of the audio, but then no one is really denying it either. And it turns out that after the Bentleys lose their luster, a pick-up from the Super Bowl may not be the most trustworthy companionship.

Because she made a recording, and she set out to lead him into trouble, but he didn’t appear to need much help.

Here are the Mud rules for rent-a-girlfriends.

They may sleep with black men, and they may be photographed with them, but they may not post the photos on the Internet, and they may not take black men to basketball games.


Your girlfriend can have sex with other guys, but if she happens to Instagram a picture of herself posing with Magic Johnson – one of middle-aged America’s favorite former athletes – you’re going to get upset?

For the record: I would stand in line and pay a fee to have my picture taken with Magic Johnson. Then I would plaster it all over the Internet. I would make it the screen shot on my phone. I would take pictures of my children out of the frames on the wall and replace them with pictures of me and Magic Johnson.

The downside?

I could never date the owner of the Los Angeles Clippers.

My loss.

Let’s get back to Mr. Trash.

The particular perversity of his bigotry is dumbfounding. It just makes no sense to the rational mind.

Here is a man who has done business with blacks for years – and made untold wealth off black basketball players – with his nose out of joint because his rental – who seems to have at least some African-American ancestry herself – might be seen publicly with a black person.

In what twisted way is that wrong?

Here’s what it looks like: Mud seems to have enjoyed showing off his rental. Why else to bring her to basketball games and otherwise be seen in public with her? Somewhere in his disgusting mind he got off having people know that he was boffing a “woman” young enough to be his great-granddaughter.

That’s the first point: Pervo wants folks to know he’s putting it to this chick.

He’s showing her off like a bauble.

It’s not just about his pleasure – you may gag now, if you’d like – it’s about an unspoken boast.

Which gets us to the second step, in his sick mind: He doesn’t want people to think his rental is getting bedded by a black man.

So, no pictures on the Internet, and no appearances at the games.

Sure, you can take “them” home, you can “sleep with them,” but don’t take them out in public.

Which is backwards of how normal people think. Most people couldn’t care less who their paramours are friends with or who they go out in public with, it’s the actual boffing they’d prefer not occur.

But this puke is just the opposite.

He doesn’t mind being cuckolded by a black man, he just doesn’t want his friends to think he’s being cuckolded by a black man.

Which is pretty effed up.

And it shows that the bigotry isn’t just about black men, it’s also, in a way, about women – or at least rentals. She is somehow a property to him, and black people degrade the perceived value of that property to him.

Which, again, is pretty effed up.

Sure, it’s a free country, and you can hate women and black people if you want.

But other people, who also live in a free country, aren’t apt to like you very much, or want to do business with you. And that is going to cause consequences that are completely deserved. This isn’t about political correctness, this is about human decency.

This is about, “Love your neighbor as yourself,” and the fact that, among people of conscience, race is no exception to that rule.

Mud showed his true colors in a secret recording. The rest of society is showing its true colors in a very public way.

America wants to scrape Mud off the sole of its shoes.

This afternoon, the NBA may begin that process.